misunderstanding

the cosmic depths of sedation
ransacked time suspended imagination
beneath old warriors and weary bones
lay rolling scrolls of sorrows
static motion caged in lost visions
apologetically chasing ancient allegories
roaming over the multiple expanses
spying wounded cities in peril
navigating tropes and plot twists
the dust refuses to settle
bridges nearly drowning in flames
and all directions point to narrow straights

i've missed the subtle inquiry
the midday rendezvous
the midnight lullabies
reminiscing adventures to a sweet chorus
while lying on lilies
untainted whispers caught in dew drops
and the message was the moment

but that was easy
soul-numbing, comfort-wielding easy

breath in with forgiven lungs
and listen with a chiseled heart
for fragmented palatal glimpses
of higher elevations
sensory derivation
rhythm in flux
could be drowned in elation

its been far too long Father
eternities it seems
since we've requested a prodigious journey
to roll back the sheath
and swiftly strike for boundless joy
and battle with aching hands held
in ragamuffin victory

liberate our captive passions
and captivate us in your liberation
stir a mighty confluence
of introspection and fraternity
of wisdom and recklessness
of action and humility

i too often wonder
when inhibitions will be overcome
when calculations will be confounded
when comforts will be violently dismantled
and our loss will be gain
let our wonder be a faint memory

to the "radical" becoming ordinary
and the abundance of "enough "

Love guided transformation
inside and out
home and abroad
roots and branches
in, through, and despite me

brought to you by "hella late...hella early early in the morning.



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"But There's Something"

So it's time now.
The look on the face of youth stood neutral.
but he could still read through it.
because he's seen part of what lies within.
so go now,
Start your new year now!
listen and sit back to the humming of yesterday.
playback the melody into bits for my ears to feed on.

turning around, he could smell the greener grass,
but another side doesn't really exist,
because we stood atop a plain that stretches into the blue.
though each hill may attack us… we step on,
despite the rolling hills or mountains.
the self struggle will always be there.
as ordinary people, we hold this sky up with our hands.
but the self struggle inside,
is dealing with trying our best just to carry ourselves.

Through the isolation you either become independent,
or you learn how much you should of appreciated a friendship.
so go on now,
the "second" you ride on,
it's on its way now.
he's experienced enough moments of being passed by;
picked himself up and dropped himself on the pharcyde of town.
she left with "time" as it reached out with both long and short hands.
pulled her in and ticked on continuously.

All that was left was her standing in the back.
one tapped his head for her request.
so she climbed out his head and left the sub conscience.
she stood there 2 dimensional,
because he only got to see her one way.
only because she hardly opened herself true.
Their images never grew bigger in size.
while the only heart he was able to see,
was the one that laid near the ace on the bed.

and while she bled.
The timeline vanished into the end of it all.
his imagination still remained intact,
but the bruised love took the world into consideration.
And it grasped a realization that the story of my life,
Is just another repetitive string attached to it all
so while he got his.
it was time for me to go again and find another lead on trying to get mine.
so I took this piece…
stapled it into my mindset and let it ride a cloud.
The white nimbus pillow let off a stardust trail that played notes of your favorite song while i sang aloud...
Then I rode the melody as the emotion jumped out of my chest.
It soloed on the fret-board of a guitar that was playing what sounded like a way to say goodbye.

I waved away as I glanced at the sun.
I looked straight up and pinched the sun with my fingers.
placed it over my mouth, and as I dropped it in I began to swallow it
I looked down to see my soul light up, so I bid an adieu to time.
the keys dipped as each hammer hit and each hit, hit harder than last.
I listened to the whispers of the future,
and all that was left was the remnants of those who tried to ease up.

so as he turned it towards his chest,
he stuck it down his life and squeezed the trigger.
the design in turn created the image for her to see.
but instead it was pushed under the bed.

Click, Click, pull, BANG!

The shot rang out and back to "conscience" I came.
Laid back and smelled the flowers while the beat rode out my words.
while i regained consciousness...

in passing.

the present is so different than the past
like a second i missed
a blink the lasted too long
i miss it because it's not the same

time
travels
past
me

and i passed through the past
like a glance through glass
i never noticed the clarity
transparency

i wish i knew what i wanted to write
because then it would write itself
i, merely an instrument of its coming
would only do what i always do

i'll let it pass through me

but today is so different than all those previous
i wish i had more than just words
more than just unheard dimensions
because if i could speak it
it would

and all by itself
me, as unnecessary as the seconds i forget,
i would be all the more inspired
to hopefully catch it in my being
they were more than just words
when they caught me standing there
waiting

but time just passes right through me.

Missing the Old You

This if for the ladies 0__0 haha

This is actually a song I wrote around the beginning of this year. I had just finished this instrumental and I was listening to it. I kinda got this vibe off of the melody of the song about missing a girl but more in the way of missing the old her because maybe shes changed into a different person that you just can't recognize whatever the reasons may be. And thats where I got the title of "Missing the Old You" from. This song has many messages, so I'll leave you to use your imagination to find them...

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Whatever shall I do,
I don't know you anymore,
Missing the old you,
What happened to that girl before?

There have been many long days and sleepless nights,
where she was always in my dreams always in my sights,
but now as I'm bout to let my emotions go,
she changed right before my eyes in a puff of smoke,
I dunno what prompted this sudden change,
cuz she was perfect as she was... no need to rearrange,
the clothes that she wears or the way she does her hair,
or the slang she be saying though i know she be playing,
If only she knew what she does to me,
how each action she does affects me sub consciously,
and even if we've grown up in the same time and place,
I never can get used to her face,
She beautiful in her own right and she has the rights,
to my heart for too long we've been apart,
I miss her the second i don't see her,
But it seems to be shes better off without me,
So this is how the story goes...so far,
This isn't the end, til the end I will defend,
Because she is someone that I hold dear,
Now ill say it all with nothing to fear...loud and clear

Whatever shall I do,
Wheres that girl that I adore,
I see the old you,
Can I talk to that girl before?

Its been a million years since I've seen your tears,
so look up and smile because it's worthwhile,
to me...there are too many things unseen,
to have you crying because your a queen,
Now I know your feeling a little overwhelmed,
but please listen to me I have something to tell,
its about you and me and our intertwined,
destiny...I know it sounds epic so don't forget it
Now I know this characature is not your character,
I know whats causing your life's discontent,
you feel the need to change for you life's betterment,
but you were never in any shape or form the type to conform,
Is the reason for your change...is it me?
am I not cool enough not up to snuff,
with what all these kids are doing these days,
making their life a purple haze,
Where your living your life at the speed of light,
only to walk home by yourself at night,
cold to everyone who "were" you friends before,
now you ignore and give them the cold shoulder,
Now your calling me, we used to be "best" friends,
but haven't talked to you since you started to blend,
in...what happened to my friend before,
who thought kicking it was all she needed evermore,
I'm telling you now that you can still change,
and in this chapter in you life I filled this page,
I hope this reaches you like a love letter will do,
I mean... like a life changing scene on the big screen.

Whatever shall I do,
Your all I've wanted and more,
I see the new you,
Your better than you were before.

Hey girl how you been how you doing,
the hugs you give are great each one renewing,
is it just me or do you feel something brewing,
that look in your eyes got me staring wondering,
Do you ever see me more that just a friend?
or am I just "that" friend that you can always depend,
on... its seems I've been singing the same song,
cuz its been you all along,
I've always been on the outside looking in,
waiting for my within to reach you...my soul twin,
but the echoes of my soul just weren't enough,
and my mind has fallen for its own bluff,
As I look into the mirror of memories,
and look as far as these 4 eyes can see,
my eyes behold and ocean full of emotion,
but I'm too afraid to jump ship to take a dip,
I feel as everything I've done I've done in vain,
and that nothing in this world can heal this pain,
Only time will tell if I heal well,
I feel locked in a cell unable to yell,
And scream out "just let everything be",
And maybe the best way to do that is be me,
I just hope you take the me inside,
And give me the hugs that make me feel alive.