overload principle

many are the hours that drag on like run on sentences
what it is can never explain what has compelled me to come to this
when drunken thoughts remain the same even after the alchy fades
and not even your sober mind can make sense of the masquerades
an awkward night sets up the following day's conversation
as you recall the things you wish you said had it been a different occasion
only your true friends can feel and witness your underlying heartaches
that are undermined by climate control, fake smiles and forced hand shakes
externally you're composed, but inside you're at a boil
as you try not to stare at the dried up dirt you once considered your rich soil
if everyday i nourished you with water, sunlight and flower seeds
and in the end the rose bloom was not destined to live for me
then i pray that God may count me ready when He deems so
and send me the most heavenly nourished love that comes matured enough to know
that every ounce of strength i've acquired from every struggle since
will be rewarded to me in the form of an appreciative, FAITHFUL & starlit prince.