Shoe Box Memories

poem i wrote at the end of 06'
it is for all those i lost within that year..or this is to some of them.not all here ya goo..
i need to write more happy poems..i hate these sad ones hhahah
inspired alot through great homie name eileen

Shoe box memories glide through the echoes of my mind
the year has past insignificantly way too fast
so i sip on this franchise cup of the Bucks
watching my little nephews run around a playground of dreams
wishing their baby cousin Jonah could grow up to be part of that dream
Thats one...
im not counting pissed of periods of my life
im not counting simple smiles similiar to those portraits next to empty lives
im counting those empty lives laying helpless with closed eyes
was this supposed to be
god took back his family without me given the change to say goodbye
but i agree, there is a time for everyones life.

Induced with a life threatning disease is already hard enough to understand
but we hold on
see our hearts were intertwined at our hands
your saying your goodbye im saying my thanks
Thats two...
to my uncle ron
you lived this fairytale truth for my cousins and I each cold december night
you were my big white wrinkled war vet
who dressed up in a red and white peach fuzz jumpsuit
and role played oh dear St. Nicholas
but in reality
you were a saint sent for us
this past christmas was hard enough not sitting on your lap
waiting to get that predicatable ten dollar envelope all of us get
our tears melted through our skin and we created memories in our hearts
reminding us that you lived out fairytale to the highest extent
and for that i give you all my respect

and its hard enough respecting how others went away
girl you had a family why waste that and live for your little girl another day
thats three
three makes one family
why'd you leave that way
you know your loved ones werent ready for that
whose your little girl gonna look up to
who is she going to fall back on when they ask her about her mom
see i wish you show her to smile like you do
your big ass smile
it was so unexpected
never regretted, wont forget it, pathetic, tragic, twisted, unpleasant, chaotic
so disrespected way to go
you didnt have to do this to yourself
now you left your little girl FAITH
with no faith to follow your footsteps
foolishly finding fearful female queens besides her mother
i wish you could see us now
you meant that much to us anna

but i agree there is a time for everyones life
accidents do happen
nothing was made perfect even if it was made for our enjoyment
living our friendship through circled stores after your passing
made me wish i was closer to you even more
your four...
see i can only remember those closed catholic school dances
where you would serenade a girl with your
popping hips, big eyes, wavy corn rows, and thrusting motions towards their faces
you did it
you did it to my girl dru
freshman year you already had an aura that would never leave you
i never go a day without thinking what you though of before that crash
if you woke up to take one more breath of life to smile and think of us
but now i live through memories left behind
mortal kombat lip syncing random ass videos
the gym team wishes you were back
i saw that too
daymn dru i wish i knew you more
only stories connect us now
we would have been so good together
reminding me of what i used to do, wear whatever i wanted
cut my hair into random haircuts your flat top my mullet
i would of gone anywhere with you
if you showed up to my door ill go with you back to the bay
if you showed up ill go with you to LA
2 am in the morning knowing we had class the next day
and i wish you would come to my door right now
i would go with you to your utopian dreamland
grab my hand take me to your heaven and show me those ciara dances i envied
but i envy you
your free...your free...

but i know all of you are not far
because i once was told
" Perhaps they are not the stars
but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones
shines down to les us know they are with us"
and ill remember to not shed a tear for your absence
just to hold on to those next to me right now
for i may not see them when i wake tomorrow

so this is for all of you here
clasp your hands together
pray for those you've lost as they are standing behind you right now
close your eyes
as they watch over you
they are with you
so smile
dont grieve
you have just set them free...